29.9.26

Injustice

My chronic conditions, and the debilitating nature of my psychological complex is know only to me, because I can't explain it, or voice it to anyone. They will only stigmatize me. The truth of what's happening to me is hidden from everyone, and left unobserved. My integrity is known only to me.

28.9.26

Dying alone

 I was having a "private moment" in the bedroom, wearing my earbuds, and a young kid yells out something at my bedroom window, "poofter!" or something.

I feel like I'll end up that destitute pensioner, alone, dying on my couch from the smoking, broken mentally beyond repair and everyone will dislike me. I already have the advanced care plan, stating I want to do the dying process at home, as the hospital system would stigmatize me, and treat me poorly if I went there. 

I notice societies pungent dynamic, and it makes me want to dry reach.

You could hand over my circumstances to an enabled person, and they'd have it sorted in just twenty four hours.


 

22.9.26

I'm a reactive cunt

I expect you to antagonise me. To suppress reactivity is to succumb like a little bitch. It's not ok for some fucking prick to disrespect me. I don't give a fuck who you are, I will react if you fucking disrespect me.