Injustice

My chronic conditions, and the debilitating nature of my psychological complex is know only to me, because I can't explain it, or voice it to anyone. They will only stigmatize me. The truth of what's happening to me is hidden from everyone, and left unobserved. My integrity is known only to me.

Dying alone

 I was having a "private moment" in the bedroom, wearing my earbuds, and a young kid yells out something at my bedroom window, "poofter!" or something.

I feel like I'll end up that destitute pensioner, alone, dying on my couch from the smoking, broken mentally beyond repair and everyone will dislike me. I already have the advanced care plan, stating I want to do the dying process at home, as the hospital system would stigmatize me, and treat me poorly if I went there. 

I notice societies pungent dynamic, and it makes me want to dry reach.

You could hand over my circumstances to an enabled person, and they'd have it sorted in just twenty four hours.

 

Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. Winston Churchill https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/winston_churchill_131188?utm_source=share&utm_medium=select

 

I'm a reactive cunt

I expect you to antagonise me. To suppress reactivity is to succumb like a little bitch. It's not ok for some fucking prick to disrespect me. I don't give a fuck who you are, I will react if you fucking disrespect me.

The best revenge is massive success. Frank Sinatra

 

You only have to be a human to be my enemy

I WANT TO BREAK YOUR FUCKING FACE!!!

 

I'll die in my deathbed, of my terminal illness, like a good little bitch

 Most people will think I'm transgender by saying that. "I always come out looking like a bitch." The same way I have any, and every time anyone has bullied me, picked on me, discriminated me and judged me. I always came out looking bad.

Suicide is liberation, to me. I want to say it as I'm gritting my fuckin teeth, breaking the razor blade as I slice my fuckin wrist open.

I hate people, I hate society, and I fucking hate culture. You will have stigma for me, and it will make you stink in my eyes. I will have no compassion for you when AI not only takes your job, but when YOU end. Fuck YOUR world.

Jesus Christ is the training of how to succumb. If I can't endure my fucking circumstances, I better pray to fucking god. 

I want to take consequence in the palm of my hand and fucking Squeeze. 

I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone. Robin Williams

 

At the end of the day, if I can say I had fun, it was a good day. Simone Biles