House of cards

I bet I stink like shit, huh. The smell of incontinence and poverty. 

Your stigma makes you seem cold and hostile. Unforgiving, whilst you go about your conformed life 

You learnt your facts from an institution.

Addiction makes me smell bad, like shit.

You are in your sociatel algorithm, overlooking the sad realities of people living in poverty, who are considered the shit of society, totally oblivious to your own trespasses because you're so deep into your pungent dynamic.

You probably invest in life insurance, because you fully believe that one million and one things will end you up in the institution of the healthcare system, dying as you lay there, in your own shit in your deathbed.

Pungent dynamics

I was ruminating the other day. Thinking about all the times I've been bullied by others. 

They targeted me as soon as I started school, before that, life was great.

The experience of bullying from every person at the highschool I went to. The pungent dynamics. The way they discriminated me like a piece of shit because I liked Nirvana. 

A cunt named kade Bolitho held me up and kneed me in the balls so hard that I was on the ground, in agony, looking like a fucking bitch

Eventually I left school because they were too mighty for me, and went into isolation, being poisoned by my mother and her partner at the time.

I couldn't forget the grin on his face as I stood there, in front of the mental health nurses, looking like a bitch, then being carted off to the psyche ward to start my stint in the system.

The fucking teacher that felt like he could stand me up in front of the whole class and run me down for the scumbag I was, dehumanising me.

I stank like shit. 

Then I started in the public housing units, complying to the institution and the politics of jailbird neighbours, all while loving masturbation, a bit too much.

They tried to heckle me out of life, I performed a weak suicide attempt to escape their wraith.

Up until about 2 years ago, when I stopped conforming to societal traditions and pungent dynamics. Death is a manmade thing because even the words are created by man.

Most people will now down to peer and sociatel constraints, and dynamics. Those people usually find themselves in the process of dying on a hospital bed in the clutches of the hospital system, which is far from perfect.

The stupidness of life's design

They say that stress is bad for one's health, then they come to logical conclusions as to why it causes disease.

I find this dynamic the stupidest thing I could imagine. The fact that stress can cause disease, stresses me out. I find it absurd that stress can cause disease. I smoke cigarettes, I won't quit because if smoking won't kill me, something else will. Mother nature created the circumstances, I'm just using the tools available to me to cope with my hell. 

I have always held onto a deep hatred for feeling bad. I hate the consequencial dynamics at play when misfortune strikes. How can such limits be placed on life's creations, when the pain that can happen can be limitless.